Been a while~ [ Fri, 20 Mar 6:50am ] [ mood | disappointed ] [ music | Another World - Kitty Shack (yeah, sims mode) ] I've read some entries while I was doing early maintenance in my icafe.. and I was just.. haayy.. I dunno how to describe it. But I kinda feel like.. I dunno what to feel. I don't hate you. Sigh. I'm just very disappointed that you haven't changed one bit. Maybe a few improvements, but the deeper issues are still there.. and I am sad that I cannot take part anymore in helping you get over those issues you honestly do not know exist.. *deep breath* It's funny, I know I shouldn't be -reminiscing- and all.. but I guess this is part of the post-traumatic stress I went through the last months that we were together.. Seeing as you have actually -continued- your -special- relationship with her.. I don't see any way that we can patch things up. It's a straight slap on the face.. like saying, "girl, she's the one for me, even before I met you, even while we're together.." Remember the song, "Lips of an Angel"? I got mad at you for posting it somewhere (I don't remember anymore) and I felt like it was for Phoebe.. but it actually was for her.. and I guess you didn't know it at the time too.. So, yah.. that's a really great way of getting back at me.. *shakes head*.. 4 years, eh? Right.. erase the 2 and a half, then. It's not included. 4 years was all for her.. I was "the pasttime" not her, as you always assure me. Makes me feel more and more that I did the right decision. Just so you know, I am very very happy right now. I have never been taken care of so unconditionally.. and no, it's not with money, gifts or anything.. It's like, he takes really good care of me like I'm a rose with petals about to fall out.. Like in "Beauty and the Beast" and Beast's rose.. He's done everything right.. we've done everything wrong. Escept that I truly loved you.. so much I gave up everything. I guess you already forgot that part, since.. you are so convinced that I have hurt you intentionally and that I am the only one at fault.. or greatly at fault. Oh well.. life goes on. It's just sad that while you are remembering painful things about me, about us.. I am remembering mundane things that turns out to should-have-been hurtful moments for me.. I never knew that you have been hurting me since day 1 and I just realized it now.. Now that I am far away from you.. Love fool.. I was. I know my faults, and I accept them.. but you don't know yours. Sad to lose a friend like you.. I loved you dearly yet was taken for granted. Yes, that term again.. "Taken for granted." This entry was supposed to let me say what I feel right at this moment, but instead, it all directed to you.. like some form of letter. What else can happen? Nothing. Even if you read this, even if you realize what I'm saying.. even if you understand.. too late. Everything is done. You know why I didn't wanna talk to you back then? You were totally unstable. Then a few months back, I thought, "Maybe she's okay now.. I'll try to contact her." But then I read/heard something about you.. confirmed it, and realized that you still weren't ready. When will you be ready..? I guess the day we'll meet again won't come unless you're ready. Just fyi, I am happy that you're happy. Just not happy that you either told me lies about what you felt for her, or you told her lies so she will keep you. *shakes head* I don't really know anymore.. you are too inconsistent. Oh well, I know someday we'll cross paths again. I can already see ahead~ I know you know what I mean.. Lady Destiny is leading us to one place.. I dunno where, I dunno when, and I dunno why.. but when that day comes.. please don't scare me away~ I'd love to talk to you when you're stable and all.. I hope that day comes. Senseless post, I think. I dunno. I should get back to my maintenance. Ciao, LJ. I got a new one. Ask and I shall add you to it. Lust

The Jury's Out [ Sat, 30 Aug 7:52pm ] [ mood | disappointed ] [ music | nothing ] And I have no lawyer. I guess that's the way it is with the prosecution. If you're the defendant, you're supposed to be guilty. Beyond reasonable doubt? Nah. 7 Lustful's | Lust

New venue for the L'arc Convention [ Tue, 20 May 9:07am ] L'arc~en~Ciel Convention on June 7, 2008 at the Katips Bar & Grilley at 209 Katipunan Road, Blue Ridge, Q.C. My band, LSS~in-a~Box, will play.. ^^ Please watch~! Lots of bands will also play.. Text me for more info.. 09162517575 1 Lustful' | Lust

Zutto Kimi No Soba De [cover] - LSS~in-a~Box [ Wed, 30 Apr 5:26pm ] [ mood | creative ] Here's a snippet of what we recorded long time ago.. Hope you all like it.. Zutto Kimi No Soba De [cover] There are 2 more songs to this collection. If you want a CD copy, we're selling for only P50/cd. ^__^ Text me +63916-2517575 if you want a copy. ^_^ Lust

I'm a proud Gaian~! ^_^ [ Sun, 23 Mar 7:34pm ] Lust

Certifications~! ^____^ [ Tue, 11 Mar 9:46am ] [ mood | smart ] 1 Lustful' | Lust

Chona Mae [ Sun, 25 Mar 9:00pm ] If you want something to lighten up your day, check out this site that I just recently discovered from training.. ^_^ http://chona.blogspot.com/ Enjoy! ^_^ Lust

Funny Cats & Cute Cats compilation Kittens [ Fri, 23 Mar 5:27pm ] Really funny! That's why I lurveeeee cats~! ^_^ 7 Lustful's | Lust

anti-"text talk" movement [ Fri, 25 Aug 4:41pm ] [ mood | Mou! ] Got this from Mommy Presea (nakiki-mommy na rin ako, dba? :P) hija_de_futah SPREAD THE WORD! Let's save our brains and the language, for crying out loud!!! 2 Lustful's | Lust

I know.. I know.. [ Tue, 16 May 9:32pm ] [ mood | bouncy ] [ music | The Simpsons on TV ] Another LJ account? Well.. each serves a different purpose.. so yeah. :P I won't be updating the others anymore, since.. there have been "spies" in it.. and I can't stop blogging about my life and love life.. so yeah.. :P Comment away if you want to be added.. :) ~ K 10 Lustful's | Lust

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